this devotion is just perfect...

(this devotion and many others can be found at www.heartlight.org)

Dear Father,

worthy of my love and obedience,
May the thought of deceit or falsehood never enter into my relations with my brothers and sisters in Christ.
Let all of us speak the truth with our neighbors, since we are members of each other.
Don't let my anger turn into sin.
May I never let the sun go down on my wrath.
Don't let grudge-holding and unforgiveness on my part give the devil any opportunity.
Help me never to covet anything that belongs to someone else, but rather to work with my mind and my hands to get the things needed by myself and others.

In the name of Jesus who sacrificed himself for my sake.
Amen.

just for her...

i want to just take a minute here and praise God for rescuing taylor swift last night...

i am grateful that beyonce put herself aside and made certain taylor received her moment 'in the sun'.

“They told me to stand by the side of the stage and I didn’t really know what was going to go down, but I thought it was so wonderful and gracious of her to do what she’s always done,” Swift said.

“She’s always been a great person before anything else.

Before the talented artist, the superstar, she’s always been a great person and I just, I thought I couldn’t love Beyoncé more tonight, then tonight happened and it was just wonderful.”

thank You, Father, for turning heartache into rejoicing...

noone does it quite like You, dearest Abba,

and i'm grateful for that too.

When we RAGE...

i call it "hulking".
there's a difference between rage and raging.
rage is something you feel
while raging is something you do.

rage comes from deep, intense pain.
first we feel the pain then we make a choice.

i love the Incredible Hulk as an example.
he has triggers,
moments before he hulks,
stepping stones that lead him to the worst of himself.

for those of us, and there are so many of us, who have
lived through extreme trauma, if we don't deal with the pain
we can easily slip into the 'hulking'...
it almost feels effortless.
that's a great word for it, because it takes immense strength to stay
still with the pain and not let it move past the pain into full-blown rage.

'staying still with the pain'...
allowing ourselves to relive the past or experience the pain of what someone
has just done to us or to those we love, without acting on that pain in a angry/violent manner.

because rage comes from trauma, what we suffered in our childhoods
often made us feel powerless.
and when we 'hulk', we feel powerful...just the opposite of the overwhelming helplessness
we suffered as a child.
when i have chosen to rage in the past, i know personally that i experience a certain
fearlessness that feels wonderful in the moment.
i am unafraid.
i am powerful.
i can destroy anyone or anything in my path.

but it's a lie,
a myth,
an illusion
or delusion.

when i rage, i am not powerful....i am weak.
i am weak when i choose to lose control.
and the damage i wreak is beyond description.

here are some basic things i've learned over the course of the last 6 years...i pray you find them healing and helpful:

*the #1 reason i am a 'recovering rager'

rather than a 'practicing rager' is GOD.
He is the only one that can truly change me from the inside out.
any success i've had so far, is directly attributed to our Father.
i praise Him for healing, renovating, and teaching me all about rage
and how to manage and heal it.
Father, i give all glory and praise to You...

*triggers - all ragers have them.

name calling, cursing, pointing, yelling, speaking after becoming angry, threatening, interrupting, sarcasm, staring/glaring, throwing things, aggressive touching, re-living our 'glory days' of former raging episodes, eye-rolling, criticizing and angry driving. (taken from http://www.rage-anon.org/RA_What_to_do_right_now.htm)

*though i've often felt like a monster when i have raged, that doesn't make me a monster

or someone beyond which cannot be saved, someone who is incapable of change.
i'm different now...new...healing...striving...and i am lovable not condemned.

*my 'complaint department' is open at all times for those i've wounded.

i don't make excuses or place blame on others if the blame is only mine to take.
i am responsible for any raging and damage i've done...i fully 'eat and own' any wrongs i've committed in anger.

*every day is a brand new start...a new beginning.

i'm grateful for God's forgiveness and His ability to give me another chance. i am responsible to make the most out of the time afforded to me.

*"no repentance - no relationship"

a quote the Holy Spirit gave me.
it means that if i have wronged another or they have wronged me, unless there is true repentance there can be no true healing and therefore no relationship.
without sincere repentance, there is nothing to say and nothing left to do but pray and love them from 'afar'...
this is true for us all.

*there is always hope!!!

regardless of past ragings/failures, there is always hope of healing and recovery...
noone can take that hope away!
"For surely there is a future and your hope will not be cut off."
{Psalms 23:18}

most of all...

i feel:

young
alert
new
alive
delicate
awake
in awe
watched over
protected
cherished
held

i feel these things when i am sitting in the palm of my Father's hand...


i feel:

afraid
unsure
insufficient
dull
nervous
fragile
frail
selfish
untrue
cold
alone

i feel these things when i am using my own 'fuel' to live...
when i'm attempting to be the captain of this ship...trying to steer my own 'course'.
when i refuse to let our Abba Father be in control.
when i grow weary...
tired of waiting...
and possibly afraid of all my prayers being answered.

that last one is a powerful one...i can feel it resonate against the walls of my heart.

do i truly want my prayers answered?

i do want my Christian family reunited and rebound with the cords of God's love and salvation.
i do want us all to worship under the same roof again.
i do want the necessary surgery and subsequent healing to come to fruition...

do i still believe that God can and will fulfill His promises?
do i still believe that God can do the impossible?
do i still want Him to?

yes...i do.

truly...

my son said a terrible thing to me last night...

took my breath away...

couldn't even talk after that...

i just sat quietly on the couch and cried...

he broke my heart.

lil b was in the kitchen when he said those things to me

and after he stopped talking, she wrote me a note

and told me how much she loves me and she was sorry for what he did,

and how he caused me so much pain.

i was grateful for her empathy and compassion.

and then this morning, just before my son left for school, he stood in the hallway and said very quietly,

"mom?"

i looked at him, then at my lap and said "yes?"

and he completely apologized and took back what he said, that he didn't mean it at all, and told me how truly sorry he was for saying those things and making me cry.

he was truly repentant...

i quietly told him that it was okay...

and suddenly, it was.

the softened heart of someone who's truly repentant is a beautiful thing to behold.

it's unmistakable,

undeniable,

it's the missing 'Balm of Gilead',

it's healing,

restoring,

life-altering

and heart-defining.

i've been denied forgiveness in the past

and though the experience was very painful,

it changed the way i see forgiveness...

forever.

so...

if you've wounded another, take the scary step forward

and in true repentance, "eat and own" what you have done.

we all make big mistakes at times and need big forgiveness.

if someone's wounded you, whether they ever apologize or not,

forgive as quickly and as thoroughly as you can.

it's the only way to be set free from the past ~

even if the past was just last night...

Amen and amen to this...i hate death!

VERSE:
For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death.
*1 Corinthians 15:25-26*

THOUGHT:
How many times have you stood over the grave of a recently departed friend or loved one?
When was the last time you tasted grief and separation from someone you dearly loved?
I don't know about you, but I am so thankful that the Bible identifies death as one of Jesus' enemies.
I am thankful that he hates death, and the damage and separation it causes, even more than I do.
I am filled with joy to know that death will be destroyed and immortality and life will be given to the children of God!

PRAYER:
Holy Father, please triumph with life and mercy in the lives of those I know who are wrestling with emotional, spiritual, and physical death.
Triumph in their lives through your power and your grace. I look forward to the day, dear Father, when death is no more.
Lord Jesus, I not only pray this in your name, but I ask you to speed this day.
Amen.
(this and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org)

powerful reminder...

(this and many other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org)

"Don't judge other people, and God will not judge you.

If you judge other people, you will be judged in the same way you judge them.

And the way you give to other people will be the way God gives to you."

Matthew 7:1-2 (ERV)

KEY THOUGHT:

As Matthew continues his presentation of Jesus' great teaching, he wants us to hear the Lord's words on how to live in our world. The previous verses have focused on how to deal with our concerns for provision and our desires for more things. In the next few verses, the focus will be on our treatment of others. Jesus doesn't want us to fault-find, gossip, or be cynical and harshly critical of those around us. He doesn't want us to assume that we know the motives of others' hearts. He wants us to be gracious to others as God has been gracious with us. However, if we choose to ignore his words, he warns that God will judge us with the same standard we use on others. Pretty sobering reminder to be gracious!

TODAY'S PRAYER:

Forgive me Father, for the times I have been less than kind about one of your children. I am sorry, because I know that you have so much more to be disappointed about in me than I do in others. Father, I want you to help me now, as I pray; please remove any bitter or critical spirit that infects my character. Through your Holy Spirit, form in me the love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control that show your presence and transformation in my life.

In Jesus' name I pray.

Amen.

how we look...

i got the scripture above in my morning devotionals and it really struck home for me...

"how you look at other people..."

wow.

i'm a firm believer that there is good in everyone.

it's just harder to find in some of us.

in fact, i'd say that we all need more than a second look to see who the people around us really are on the inside...

the world we live in today, can be so incredibly cynical and dismissive.

we can be so cynical and dismissive

and we often are.

the teacher who snapped at your children...

the bank teller you've gone to for years, suddenly bites your head off...

the grocery clerk who's always friendly, sighs impatiently while you're digging for coupons...

the bus driver, your doctor, the mechanic, your roommate, your boss and the list goes on!

are they just a bunch of jerks or is there more to their stories?

do they need another look?

how do we look at them?

because the Word says how we look at someone is what makes us who we are...

we need to take a second, third and seventh look at those around us and ask ourselves,

"are we looking for the good in that person or just digging for dirt?"

someone once said "...perception is everything".

and in this case, i agree.

so...

how are you looking at the people around you today?

or to put it another way...

are you holding binoculars or a shovel?

for our Ernzy...

My Mom put this in today's Spokesman Review...we miss you always, precious Ernzy...always.

a beautiful devotion from charles spurgeon and www.heartlight.org

"The Lord is slow to anger, and great in power."

-- Nahum 1:3

Jehovah "is slow to anger."

When mercy comes into the world she drives winged steeds;

the axles of her chariot-wheels are red hot with speed;

but when wrath goes forth, it toils on with tardy footsteps, for God takes no pleasure in the sinner's death.

God's rod of mercy is ever in his hands outstretched;

his sword of justice is in its scabbard, held down by that pierced hand of love which bled for the sins of men.

"The Lord is slow to anger," because he is GREAT IN POWER.

He is truly great in power who hath power over himself.

When God's power doth restrain himself, then it is power indeed:

the power that binds omnipotence is omnipotence surpassed.

A man who has a strong mind can bear to be insulted long, and only resents the wrong when a sense of right demands his action.

The weak mind is irritated at a little:

the strong mind bears it like a rock which moves not,

though a thousand breakers dash upon it, and cast their pitiful malice in spray upon its summit.

God marks his enemies, and yet he stirs not himself, but holds in his anger.

If he were less divine than he is, he would long before this have sent forth the whole of his thunders,

and emptied the magazines of heaven;

he would long ere this have blasted the earth with the wondrous fires of its lower regions,

and man would have been utterly destroyed; but the greatness of his power brings us mercy.

Dear reader, what is your state this evening?

Can you by humble faith look to Jesus, and say, "My substitute, thou art my rock, my trust"?

Then, beloved, be not afraid of God's power;

for by faith you have fled to Christ for refuge, the power of God need no more terrify you,

than the shield and sword of the warrior need terrify those whom he loves.

Rather rejoice that he who is "great in power" is your Father and Friend.

another great devotion from www.heartlight.org

LIVING IN HARMONY

Romans 12:16-21

Dear Father, God of the lowly,

Help me live in harmony with others -

without haughtiness, without conceit, willing to associate with the lowly.

Help me to repay no one evil for evil, but to take thought for what is noble in the sight of all.

As far as it depends on me, let me live peaceably with everyone.

Let me seek no revenge for myself, but leave it to your wrath, O God.

Help me, Father, not to be overcome with evil, but to overcome evil with good.

In the name and authority of Jesus I boldly come, asking these things according to his will.

Amen.

this is a great devotion from www.heartlight.org

"You have heard that it was said to our people long ago, 'Don't kill any person.

And any person that kills will be judged.' But I tell you, don't be angry with another person.

Every person is your brother. If you are angry with other people, you will be judged.

And if you say bad things to another person, you will be judged by the Jewish council.

And if you call another person a fool, you will be in danger of the fire of hell."

-- Matthew 5:21-22 (ERV)

KEY THOUGHT:

As religious people, it is so easy for us to feel pious and righteous when we hear of all the horrible things done in our world that are ungodly.

"Thankfully I'm not one of them!" we can smugly think to ourselves.

Jesus shatters all of our smugness.

He tells us that he wants our righteousness to exceed that of the Pharisees and Scribes.

He really means it.

The next several verses will drive this point home.

The character of heart described in the beatitudes is now demanded of disciples in our everyday lives.

There's no room for smugness when Jesus tells us that angry hatred, slanderous gossip, or shaming speech puts us in the same category as murderers.

His point?

Murder starts in the heart and works its way out.

These two actions are all part of the same continuum -- different by degree, not by kind.

TODAY'S PRAYER:

O Lord, purge from my heart all bitterness, hatred, and venomous anger.

Give me your Spirit of forgiveness and grace.

I want to be pure in heart and hold nothing against those you love.

Father, I don't want to poison my heart with the stains of Satan's tools of anger, judgmentalism, and disrespect.

In Jesus' name I pray.

Amen.

ever thine...

for those of us who love someone and are loved in return -
measure for measure,
we can call ourselves blessed...

for those of us who love someone who does not love us back -
if we've truly given of ourselves,
we can live without regret...

and for those of us who love only ourselves -
in the end,
we are the lonely ones...

for myself,
i'd rather love with all my heart and be turned away -
than never take the risk at all...

happy valentine's day to us all.

dealing with distraction...

sometimes my mind wanders...

even if i'm doing something really fulfilling, sometimes my mind will wander off a bit on a trail that is usually trivial and meaningless.

this only bothers me if it happens when i am supposed to be actively listening to someone else,

and during my devotions and prayer time with God.

if it happens during a time of crisis or great pain, that is only to be expected...

our emotions are constantly trying to survive the moment or moments,

so our thoughts and our emotions wander off to smaller rabbit trails.

but sometimes when i read my devotions and talk to our Abba, my mind will think of 20 other things i could be doing elsewhere.

stupid little things that aren't even slightly comparable to my time with the Lord.

and if i put those other things above my time with Him, i cause Him pain.

it is an insult to God...it hurts Him.

He was never meant to 'play second fiddle' in our hearts.

have you ever been talking with someone, really talking about something important in your life

and you can just tell the person across from you isn't listening?

they're nodding in all the right places but there is a bit of vacancy behind the eyes?

doesn't it hurt?

even just a little?

here's why...

if we are trying to communicate something near and dear to our hearts and our friend/partner/spouse/children aren't really 'tuning in', their behavior gives off a silent yet striking message:

i am more interested in what's going on in my life than what's happening in yours...

now to be fair, that is probably NOT the intention of the vacant listener across from you.

they are probably NOT trying to hurt or ignore you...

but regardless of intentions, it hurts anyway.

because we all want to be seen, to be heard...

when our God pays attention to us, He notices every itsy bitsy tiny detail and nuance.

He gives us His complete and undivided attention.

even the smallest prayer or concern matters a great deal to God.

He adores adoring you...

and that undivided and Holy attention from God sends us this unfailing message:

i love you enough to truly listen and care about whatever you're going through.

you matter to Me.

I value your thoughts and struggles.

I value you...

dearest Abba,

please help me to discipline my thought-life to the point of really actively listening and responding to those around me.

help me to set aside my own wandering thoughts long enough to truly listen to You and others that You've placed in my life.

help me to give my full attention to You the way You do for me.

i never want to put You in 2ND or 3RD place in my heart and thought-life.

You are truly worthy to be my chief priority and i never want to hurt You, my Father...

with all i am and all i want to be,

Your laineyrose

this is a small devotion taken from www.heartlight.org...i praise Abba for this site!

VERSE:

"I will sing to the LORD all my life;

I will sing praise to my God as long as I live.

May my meditation be pleasing to him, as I rejoice in the LORD."

~Psalm 104:33-34~

THOUGHT:

Do you sing in the shower?

What words are on your lips?

Singing is such a wonderful gift!

First, it is a gift from God to us, to help us express our joy, excitement, sorrow, and victory.

Second, it is a gift from us to God, to help us communicate our respect, appreciation, love, and

confidence in God.

So let's sing, praising God for what he has done, proclaiming what he will do, and sharing what he is

currently doing in our lives!

PRAYER:

O God, Father in heaven, even your name is holy.

Please exert your will over my heart, and the hearts of those in our world, so they more closely reflect

your holy character.

I trust you, dear LORD, for the food I need each day.

I ask you, Holy Father, to forgive me as I release my bitterness and anger which I have held against those

who have wounded me ~

I will need your help to do this.

Empower me, O God, to resist the temptations and deceptions of the Evil One.

Please make my life a glorious witness to your grace.

In Jesus' name I pray.

Amen.

when we walk away from God...

it is so very easy to walk away from God.
it takes just a moment.
all we have to do is close the door in our hearts, turn our backs and walk away.
most believers have walked away at one point or another...
i believe the most prevalent reason is that we became disappointed, disillusioned and eventually, bitter.

the most painful times in my walk with Abba Father have occurred when i cry out desperately for a particular prayer to be answered and though reassured i am asking in accordance with His Will, and reassured by my closest friends that God can do anything...that nothing is impossible for God ~

He says no.

just like that.
not "NEVER"
but no for now...
or sometimes He says "soon" (which as Abba knows, is incredibly frustrating to hear!)

perhaps we're in a failing marriage and have decided to stay committed, our feet rooted to the floor of our home, determined to hold on and wait for God to refresh and rejuvenate our relationship.
we won't run away.
until...
the pain keeps building and building and building and in our pain, from the gaping wound we call our marriage, when we fall, gasping for breath, in anger we refuse the hand God extends to pull us back up.
maybe because we know God will give us the ability to endure and endure some more.
and we become tired of the pain, we become frustrated and then the words we thought we would never say,
bubble to the surface:

NO MORE!

we feel we can't and don't want to hold on...
we are tired of praying for the same thing when nothing seems to change.
and we know that our Abba Father is going to say, "hold on..."
and those are the words we can no longer bear to hear.
we all wonder why God says no or nothing at all, during real times of crisis.
we wonder where He is,
did He take a vacation?
or is He there but just doesn't care enough about our pain to help us?
and in our pain and bitterness over our desperate, (seemingly) unanswered prayers,
we walk away from the Father who doesn't seem to care enough to help us in the worst times of our lives.
so we close the door.
we say it's over
maybe we say "screw you!"
and just like that,
it's over.
and we walk away...

(i love that line in "Bruce Almighty" where he yells at God and tells Him that He could fix all of his problems in 5 minutes...
i think i've actually said that to God before!)

on some level, we know that going back to God means more pain, more trials and we don't want to willingly suffer anymore.
and honestly, that's the truth.
that to be a Christian means there will be suffering for His sake...because we've chosen to "drink from the same cup" as Jesus did...
the cup of sorrow and sacrifice...
it means facing rejection from the world and ferocious persecution from satan.
it means bearing our own crosses so that we can follow in the precious footsteps of Jesus.

loving and talking and spending time with our Abba Father is so priceless yet it is so costly at the same time.
our walk with Him, eschewing the world and satan, staying close to His side, following His Word
and making ourselves vulnerable and accessible to Jesus and the Holy Spirit ~
just plain sucks sometimes.

it hurts.

the very moment we ask Jesus into our hearts and lives, to be our Lord and Savior,
is just like painting a red bulls eye on our front and back.
we are instantly a target for satan and his legions of demoniac followers.
he hates us beyond anything we can imagine and it is his sole aim to destroy us all.
to make sure we stay very far away from God.
to make us incapable of hoping anymore...of believing anymore.
we are prey, to put it plainly.
and until we all go Home, that never changes...

so, okay, following after God/Jesus/Holy Spirit, can really suck sometimes...it can feel as if we're dying in the moment and as if He doesn't hear us or care enough about us to truly help us when we cry out in desperation.

but can i tell you something else?
whatever pain we endure here, is truly not even comparable to the pain and suffering Jesus endured on the Cross for us.
so great is His undying Love...
loving God, staying by His side, keeping our little hand in His is also the only reason worth living for.
i love my children beyond description or explanation, and my Ma and Dad and my sisters, my lil petey, ttt, shawnzy, my god-children and jeff.
i love them above any others on this planet.
but...
here's the difference between loving them all and loving God:

i can't survive without God...
don't mistake me, i have lost so many loved ones and there have been times i could barely get my feet out of bed and i just didn't want to go on living without that person...
but our Abba Father gave me the will and the strength to go on living without them...
He saved me.
(especially after ernzy's death, when i truly wasn't 'making it' at all).
i can live without my loved ones, though i pray that won't happen any time soon or at all...

but i simply cannot live without God.
i wouldn't even want to try...
He is the only One who makes sense out of my life.
He is the reason i go on.
He makes it possible for me to love and care for all the people in my life.
He gives me hope for tomorrow
and peace for today.

i cannot live without God.

so, my dear nomadic friends,
if you have walked away from God, i know you feel a void that can only be filled by Him.
i know you miss Him.
you miss the closeness you had with Him on a daily basis.
i know it.
i know it because every time i've given up on Him, the emptiness i felt was vast and endless.
and you know that you will never have peace again until you return to Him.

no matter if you have attempted to fill yourself up with things or people that the world deems "happiness"...
no matter if you've convinced yourself that living without Him is the right choice.
you know it is not.

come back, dearest friends, come back...
though you may feel as if it's too late or you've done too much damage to yourselves and others ~
it's not too late.

start the new year on Holy footing...
choose Him, for you know He has chosen you.
we can technically survive without God,
but then again, that's not really living, is it?

God
loves
you...

the only question left is,
do you love Him?

at long last...

yesterday morning i woke up crying.
i had the worst dream about one of my daughters...
she was in a fire, badly burned and was dying because of it.
she knew she was dying and she tried to make it easier for me.
even though it hurt her, she smiled at me and said:
"it's okay, momma, we'll see each other again in Heaven."

i woke up sobbing and was so glad it wasn't real
that i had to stumble down the hall to see her precious little face...
i could barely talk through my tears as i tried to explain i'd had a bad dream.

i just hugged her and told her over and over how much i loved her,
how much she meant to me...

the sad truth is

because we live, we also must die...
and though i understand with my mind that death is just a part of the cycle of life,
i've begun to hate death.
i hate it.
i hate loss.
i really do.

i hate the parting that comes between us all, in the moment we pass away from this world.
i hate the staggering pain.
the complete enormity of it all.
of being left behind.
of struggling beneath the agony just to get out of bed and keep going...

if you asked me what i look forward to most in Heaven,
(outside of spending eternity with my Abba Father, Brother Jesus and the precious Holy Spirit)
my answer is always the same:

Death will be no more.
no more loss.
the word "goodbye" will no longer be a part of our vocabulary,
and i will never again be left behind grieving for the people i've lost,
for stolen moments,
stolen years.

can you imagine a world without pain...without loss?
that is what awaits each child of God.
no more grief
no more sorrow
no more tears...

to know for once and for all,
that Life has won over Death,
that Good has won over Evil
that our precious Father has triumphed over Satan,
and the Holy War is over at long last.
and when Jesus returns, He'll say the most precious words:

let's go Home...

i love it.
i really do.

To set the captives free...

last night i had the privilege of seeing the film Braveheart again...

i saw it last in 1998, fell in love with it and purchased it, but felt i couldn't watch it again because of the absolute heartache and suffering.

until last night...

when all my children were gone for the weekend,

and the house was peaceful and silent,

i watched it again.

William Ross Wallace is one of my heroes.
he lived, fought and bled for Scotland.
and more than that - for the belief that all men should be free...
that belief cost him his life...and gave Scotland theirs.

it seems freedom can only come with a price.
usually that price is the blood and sacrifice of all a person holds dear.
even as i write this, our men and women are dying right now to keep us free.
to keep our children and their children and their children ~ free.
the freedoms i can never imagine living without...

i cannot write the words to show how deeply grateful i am to each soldier, each soldier's wife or husband, each soldiers mother and father, for the freedoms i have right now...

for every wife or husband who learns their spouse will never come home again ~

thank you thank you thank you.

for every child who will grow to adulthood without their parent by their side ~

thank you thank you thank you.

for every mother and father who will never hold their child-soldier again ~

thank you thank you thank you.

you are all my 'braveheart'...
and though i have never deserved these freedoms i sit upon, i will never forget you...
i write your names upon my heart and these words upon my life.

there is another Braveheart.
He is the truest soldier i have ever known.
He has no medals.
no unmarked grave.
no flowers on Veteran's Day.
no flag upon His chest.
no government to stand beside
and His heroism is often overlooked and unsung...

this soldier is the Son of God.
He is Jesus Christ of Nazareth.
He bled and died upon the belief that all men should be free.
all of us.
each man, woman and child.
irrespective of country and home.

His life, His death, was each moment, for our freedom.
undeserved though we all remain
of His priceless mercy and love,
He came to "set the captives free",
to purchase our freedom at any cost to Himself.
every word from His lips, every drop from His blood
was given for you and me.

that freedom is for us all.
His life for ours.
and all we have to do is say one small word ~

yes.
yes.
yes.

what will you say to the King of Kings?
to the greatest soldier of all time?
each of us must decide.

i say yes to the greatest Braveheart i will ever know...
i say yes for freedom.
for my life,
for my children,
and for their children's freedom.

thank You, Jesus,

for Your unfathomable Love,

Your incalculable sacrifice,

and for freeing us from sin and eternal darkness...

thank You
thank You

thank You...

"To say to the captives, 'Come out,'

and to those in darkness, 'Be free!'..."

~Isaiah 49:9~

"To give light to them that sit in darkness and in the shadow of death."
~Luke 1:49~

Everything about You...

i love You so very much, my Father...

i love Your:

kindness

mercy

strength

patience

perserverance

grace and graciousness

healing

restoration

renewal

silence

power

protection

nurturing
serenity

peace

acceptance

hope

understanding

gentility

constant availability

creations ~ especially my lil petey and Your glorious rain!

forgiveness

and unconditional Love in this very conditional world...

every single moment i'm alive is a gift from You and You alone.

my children, my greatest blessing, are directly from Your heart to mine.

and though i am a pauper in this world, i am a princess in Yours...

the Home You call Your own will one day be mine as well.

so, Father?

i

love

You

and more than that,

i

love

everything

about

You...

after all, what child could ever ask for more?

When dreams die...

so many of us have experienced those life-changing moments when we realize a dream is about to die...

specifically, when the dream of our marriages die.
when the only seeming certainty is a pending divorce decree and the complete upheaval it brings with it.

what we once thought was our life is forever altered and the absolute shock and trauma of it can be staggering.

how do you let go of a dream that can never come true?

the only answer i've found to that question is God...

He is the only One who has everything we need to survive the death of a dream.

healing, restoration, protection, counsel, refreshment, encouragement, unconditional love and acceptance and most of all ~

hope.

our Abba Father gives us hope to carry on, to pick up the pieces of the broken pictures of our lives.
He gives us hope not only of healing and restoration, but the ability to still believe in Love...

that it exists.
that others have it.
that it takes faith to see it
and work to keep it.

that Love alone, is possible.

that 'this too shall pass'
that the pain gets less
that hope does 'spring anew'
that life hasn't passed you by
there's more and more.
that the children will heal as well...given time.
that trusting someone doesn't always end in grief...in sorrow.

Love is possible.

did you know?
do you believe it?
are you hurting?
are you learning the painful lesson of letting go?
that we don't always get what we want because we don't always know what we need?
that your divorce doesn't define you?
that life can shine most beautifully when it comes after death?
that this isn't the end of your story, just the closing of a chapter?

Love is possible.

whereever you are today, please know that each day, each moment is a brand new beginning.
you can start again.
you can be the proverbial Phoenix that rises from the ashes.
you can be the blossoming of Spring.
you can be whole.
you can be new.
you can truly live again,
but most of all...
you can love again.

because

Love
is
possible...

Happy Birthday Ernzy...

Happy Birthday, Ernzy.

i love and miss you, ernzy...

no matter how much time passes by, i love and miss you just the same.

i want to pick up the phone and sing you Happy Birthday like i have done for years, and hear your voice just once more.

i wish you were here, ernzy...

i wish i could hug you and tell you how much you truly mean to me.

i wish i could have taken all of your pain away.

Christmas Eve is coming soon, ernzy...

did you know that your absence has changed everything?

that Thanksgiving and especially Christmas Eve, are forever different because you are no longer here?

mom and dad brought you flowers and balloons for your birthday, ernzy...

we celebrate your life even more especially because you aren't here to share it with us.

Happy Birthday, precious ernzy...

we celebrate you.

Happy Birthday Ma...

Happy Birthday, precious Ma...

you are so very precious to all of those around you.

your life is a blessing, Ma.

i'm blessed to know and love you.

i know your birthday is hard without your little boy...

i know you ache for him.

but your life is truly worth celebrating

because you are more than a survivor,

you are a champion.

you're my personal hero, Ma...

i'm proud of who you are and how much you love your family and friends.

your random acts of kindness and thoughtfulness mean the world

to the ones you bless.

i am one of those, Ma.

thank you just for being who you are...

and Happy, Happy Birthday to you!

your life shines upon us all...

so alone...

"Then all of Jesus' followers left him and ran away."
Mark 14:50

KEY THOUGHT:

For me, this is one of the saddest verses in all the Bible.
Jesus is completely left alone by those whom he had loved, trained, warned, and prepared.
The Son of God will now face the pent-up fury of those who have hated him.
He will bear unspeakable brutality and have no one to stand with him in his time of agony.
He will die alone.
Because he has faced abandonment, we can rest assured that he knows how we feel when we are abandoned, betrayed, and abused.
However, because Jesus died alone, he has promised us we would never be abandoned.
He promises to be with us every step of the way.

TODAY'S PRAYER:

Father, in those times that I feel most alone and abandoned, please help me remember Jesus
and realize that he not only knows those feelings of abandonment,
but he also has promised to never abandon me.
Thank you for this assurance based on such a costly sacrifice.
In Jesus' name I thank you.
Amen.

(this and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org.)

thank You...

thank You, my Abba Father,

for all You are and all You've done...

Your beauty is everywhere.

Your grace covers me each day.

Your Love lifts me from my daily troubles and enfolds me in the safety of Your arms.

i live for You, my Abba...

everything beautiful in my life is because of You and You alone.

all the Glory and credit belongs to You.

thank You for my children, Father...they truly fill my heart with light and i will love them for always and always.

thank You for my lil Petey...he brings me joy, companionship and i love him so.

thank You for Ma & Dad, J, my sisters and friends...they are simply precious and irreplaceable.

i don't have an eloquent speech prepared or a beautified prayer...just these 3 words:

"thank You, Father"

and knowing You, dearest Abba, that is enough...

i was blessed last night...

last night i had the rare opportunity of re-connecting with someone that has always been dear to me...

we were able to spend a good chunk of time getting to know a part of what has happened in each of our lives over the last 20 or so years.

he is a wonderful person, friend, brother, son and man ~
and i am blessed to have him, once again, in my life.

he earnestly cares for his family and friends and in general, he loves people.
he 'walks unafraid' in this life and it's truly refreshing to know someone like this.

because tomorrow is not promised to any of us, i do my best to live fully in the moment, to give myself wholly to right now.

and right now i am just grateful to my Abba Father for the extra joy i have in my heart.

so...

J, thank you for who you are and for the delight last night was...i am blessed to know and care about you.

and as always, Father, thank You for all You are and do in my life...
i am proud and blessed beyond measure to always be Your laineyrose.

Things Jesus Might Say!

What would Jesus say when the Dow swings nearly 1,000 points in one day?

I'm not sure, but this is my take on it...

"You know I love you.

Your value has not changed one bit, no matter what's happened to your market accounts.

The downturn in the market can remind you of something I have often said:

'This world is not your home.'

Not long ago people would store up their treasures in barns where moth and rust could destroy.

Your investments are a little more high-tech, but not so much different in some ways.

You're not worried about moths or rust, you're worried about uncertainty and sudden downswings

you cannot control.

Like the scriptures say, cast all your anxieties on me because I love you.

Maybe that means something more to you today than ever before.

If so, that's a good thing!"

As the market goes up and down, always know that my love for you never changes.

In other words, let my love be the most important factor in your mindset and attitude,

not what Fox News or CNN is reporting.

My love will bring comfort to your soul.

I know you're stressed-out.

Faithful people have faced terrible circumstances many times over the years.

Just keep your eyes focused on me and my Father's will.

"Most financial analysts are exactly right when they say 'focus on the long term.'

This is a principle my Father's Word has been teaching for generations.

Much tragedy occurs when people make rash decisions, when they get carried away with 'short-term crisis.

'I've seen people take harsh measures and make terrible decisions because they could only seethe moment.

Focus on all the promises for eternity.

That will make huge difference today!

Let the current market crisis help you re-frame your thinking with respect to the future.

My Father wants us to look past the short term and focus on a more distant horizon.

And that horizon depends wholly on His will.

The future depends on the Father's love and plans, not on the Dow Jones.

No matter what happens today or tomorrow, His plans are to give you a hope and a future

of calling on His name and finding Him.

"There are so many things I could say, many things I have already said in The Word.

Go there and spend more time with me.

What if the biggest gain you make in the midst of all these market losses is a new walk with me and my Father? That would be wonderful, huh?!

Just think of how much better off you'll be, no matter what happens with your portfolio.

But let me say this: I think you'll be fine.

I hope your financial security makes a rebound.

Over the years much good has been done in this world by prospered people who have gotten

their priorities in order.

Perhaps my father is preparing you for the greatest opportunities of your life.

I hope so."In the meantime, don't ever forget this:

I love you no matter what.And no matter what occurs today or tomorrow, your value will never change."

~this devotion by Danny Sims and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org~

A Little Spunk Needed? ~ by Rob Frazier

"I was walking through the Atlanta airport, CNN blaring in the background,

headlines screaming from the news stands stocked with magazines

covered with glum faces, all the news is bad, bad, bad.

You can't help but worry and wonder what the future will hold, what your retirement will be like,

what will be left over when all the dust settles.

Then I saw her.

She was about 8 years old and a darling little girl.

She was with her mother and father and older brother.

She was also on crutches.

Her legs barely made a ripple in her little jeans, obviously withered and weak from some

chromosome that came unraveled while she was being knitted in the womb.

She was happy, and swung her legs in a strong rhythmic motion with her crutches to keep pace

with her parents and brother.

She was in every way a typical 8 year-old except for her withered extremities.

I thought that no matter where the stock market ends up, or how the economy falls or rises,

she will still be crippled.

She will grow up in a world where a pair of shorts will be a cause for people to stare.

She'll feel left out as other kids run and play at school, and she will struggle to find a formal dress for the Homecoming dance that will accommodate her braced legs and crutches.

It's too early to fold, and we're made of better stuff!

No matter if my 401(k) recovers or not, she will always -- always -- be crippled.

Her parents may lose their job, I might lose mine, but she will never lose her infirmity.

We may all weather this storm with nothing more than a few fallen limbs in the yard, but her limbs

will never be whole.

It made me a little angry that we have been focused on what we lost, not what we have.

I remember Sam Walton, after the 1987 crash, when he said that even after watching Wal-Mart stock fall by a third, he still had the same number of shirts on the shelves as he did the day before.

That is the kind of thinking, the kind of investing, and the kind of courage we need now.

The losses are paper losses.

The value is still there in the companies the stocks represent.

If we will each keep our head in this mess, we'll work through this.

That really is what the little girl does.

She marches through the airport like she had every right to be there, withered legs and all.

No sympathy, no melancholy, just the spirit and spunk to deal with the hand she was dealt.

We need to take a deep breath and get ready to play the game.

It's too early to fold, and we're made of better stuff ~

the same kind of stuff of which that little girl is made."

(c) 2008 Rob Frazier

~this and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org~

when all others have gone...

in the last 5 years, i have lost almost everyone i've ever loved...

one day here, the next just gone.

i've prayed, fasted, believed and hoped for miracles...yet not one has returned to both Abba and me.

i've made huge mistakes and asked for a forgiveness that i did not deserve.

i've stumbled and fallen and it has been God alone who has saved me from the great abyss.

what i've learned in this time, in the 'valley of God' is this:

God will never leave or forsake me

i cannot earn or ever deserve, His Love, Grace and Forgiveness

He is with me at all times, in all places

though i have been forsaken by those i've loved, He would never do the same to me

He would never do the same to you

i have to hold on despite seeming like a ridiculous, modern-day noah

and most of all...

nothing is impossible with God ~ absolutely nothing.

dearest Abba,

save and forgive me from my terrible foolishness, huge mistakes and the doubts that assail me daily...

i am nothing without You, my King of Kings.

i have no future without you...my only future is You.

You are the only One that makes my life make sense...

with all the love i possess ~ Your most unworthy daughter,

Your laineyrose

"I will"

"And I will deliver thee out of the hand of the wicked, and I will redeem thee out of the hand of the terrible." ~Jeremiah 15:21~

Note the glorious personality of the promise.

I will, I will.

The Lord Jehovah himself interposes to deliver and redeem his people.

He pledges himself personally to rescue them.

His own arm shall do it, that he may have the glory.

Here is not a word said of any effort of our own which may be needed to assist the Lord.

Neither our strength nor our weakness is taken into the account, but the lone I, like the sun in the heavens, shines out resplendent in all-sufficiency.

Why then do we calculate our forces, and consult with flesh and blood to our grievous wounding?

Jehovah has power enough without borrowing from our puny arm.

Peace, ye unbelieving thoughts, be still, and know that the Lord reigneth.

Nor is there a hint concerning secondary means and causes.

The Lord says nothing of friends and helpers:

he undertakes the work alone, and feels no need of human arms to aid him.

Vain are all our lookings around to companions and relatives;

they are broken reeds if we lean upon them-often unwilling when able, and unable when they are willing.

Since the promise comes alone from God, it would be well to wait only upon him;

and when we do so, our expectation never fails us.

Who are the wicked that we should fear them?

The Lord will utterly consume them;they are to be pitied rather than feared.

As for terrible ones, they are only terrors to those who have no God to fly to, for when the Lord

is on our side, whom shall we fear?

If we run into sin to please the wicked, we have cause to be alarmed, but if we hold fast our integrity,

the rage of tyrants shall be overruled for our good.

When the fish swallowed Jonah, he found him a morsel which he could not digest;

and when the world devours the church, it is glad to be rid of it again.

In all times of fiery trial, in patience let us possess our souls.

~Other Charles Spurgeon's devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org.~

my lil love...

my lil mini-doxie, petey, is the love of my life...

he is my best friend and i love him beyond thought or measure.

a week ago yesterday i had to bring him into pet ER clinic for a small infection.

i thought i was losing him and was absolutely devastated...

the antibiotics were finished yesterday and then last night he swallowed a small portion of sport's tape from my girls' bedroom floor.

the tape can hurt his digestive track and cause an infection...

they wanted me to bring in petey but i can't afford it -

(it cost me $244.00 to take him to the pet ER clinic last sunday)

if he starts the 'v' word or the 'd' word (sorry, i hate both of those words) he has to be seen immediately.

he has to be watched carefully for the next week...

now i will be afraid of losing him for another week and after speaking to the nurse over the phone,

i just cried and cried.

even if you don't know me, could you please say a prayer for petey?

i've lost too many people to lose my precious lil friend as well...

thank you for listening and for any prayers you offer up on me and petey's behalf...

may God bless you all,

laineyrose